Dear Families and Friends,

We’ve been talking a great deal this term about bravery and courage, and about our 4Cs idea: Facing a Challenge with Courage leads to Confidence to Cope. But bravery does not usually arrive with a fanfare. Most of the time, it is found in the small, ordinary moments of everyday life.

For one of our youngest children, bravery might simply be walking through the Early Years door when they would much rather stay holding Mum or Dad’s hand. It might be getting through a long school day when everything is still new and they are absolutely exhausted by the end of it. For another child, it might be putting up a hand, joining a game, trying a new food, speaking in front of others, admitting a mistake, asking for help or having another go at something they found difficult yesterday. These are the moments worth noticing.

Sometimes the most helpful thing we can say is simply: “Well done. You did it.”

Not “See, there was nothing to worry about.” There may have been something to worry about! And not necessarily “That was easy.” It might have felt anything but easy to them. Instead: “I know that was hard. You were brave. You did it.”

That gentle acknowledgement matters because it helps children connect the feeling of difficulty with the experience of getting through it. Gradually, they begin to build up a bank of memories which says, “I have felt like this before. I managed then. Perhaps I can manage this too.” That is how confidence grows.

Perhaps courage is a little like a muscle. We build it by using it – through lots of manageable opportunities to be brave, followed by encouragement to take the next step. Our job as adults isn't to remove every uncomfortable feeling or obstacle from a child's path. It is to make sure they are safe and supported while they discover that they are increasingly able to face them. And, of course, this isn't just something children need to learn. Whether we are 3, 30 or 60, life keeps giving us things that require courage. Adults have to try new things, cope with disappointment, admit mistakes, have difficult conversations, ask for help and sometimes simply keep going when we'd rather not.

There can even be a little act of bravery involved in parenting: letting go. Entrusting your three- or four-year-old to us at the school gate when they are tearful isn't always easy. Allowing an older child to tackle something themselves rather than immediately stepping in can be difficult too. Part of the partnership between home and school is trusting one another enough to give children those opportunities, while knowing that we are there to support them when they genuinely need us.

So perhaps there is a little challenge for all of us this week. Notice a small act of courage. Name it. Encourage it.

And when your child does something that was difficult for them – however ordinary it might appear to the rest of us – perhaps give them those four very simple words: “Well done. You did it.” Then, when they're ready, encourage them towards the next brave step.

Our communication with you about what is happening in school is very important to us. As some of you are aware, there is currently a small issue with the Juniper app which means that some parents cannot always access information for younger siblings. This is with the team and we hope it will be resolved soon. In the meantime, have you checked out our Class Pages this term? Every week, each teacher adds a highlight or two from the week to give you a little insight into your child’s life and learning in school. Please do take a look and use the updates as a chance to talk to your child about what they have been learning, enjoying and doing during the week.

Have a great weekend.

Yours sincerely,
Mr Restall & The St Bart’s Team